Raleigh Psychotherapy Blog

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Ever have that feeling that something is a little bit off in the way you’re taking on life?

On the outside, you look like you have it all together and everything is going well in your life. Other people may even see you as successful, giving and caring, but inside you feel awful because you can’t get things “right”?

THE REASON MAY BE SHAME.

Underneath the image you project, you know that what the world sees is a false front crafted to hide the self-doubt, fear, anger and resentment you often feel. You work hard, yet never seem to live up to your own...

If you’ve been following my blog for a while, you know I find valuable messages in movies. If you are looking for a film with a helpful message and lots of fun, the Pixar film Inside Out will not disappoint. It is the story of Riley, a young girl from

the Midwest who has her life turned upside down when her father started a new job in San Francisco. 

Riley is guided by her emotions: Joy, Fear, Anger, Disgust and Sadness. These emotions live in the control center inside Riley’s mind, where they help navigate her through everyday...

Frequently, we talk about mindfulness as a way to stop living on auto-pilot by paying attention to your life and making intentional decisions. Mindfulness is a way to tap into your internal resources so you can use them to reduce stress and conflict.

Sounds good, but how do you get there?  Here are some key concepts which can help you develop an attitude of mindfulness in your everyday living.

1. Focus on the moment:  

It is important to have a plan for your future, but once you have that in place, it is necessary to focus o...

We are living in a moment of tremendous potential.  We are surrounded by change and the potential for more.  An important movement is underway: the movement toward anti-racism, justice reform, and to end police brutality and systemic racism. 

It would be very easy to do nothing, even if we wanted to help.  Life gets busy, we get involved with our everyday schedules, and things that are out of sight seem to disappear into tomorrow.   Many of us doubt the impact one voice can have.  The world is so big and there are so many people, it is e...

Think about the last few movies you watched… or television shows… or books you read.   What kind of relationship did the main characters have?  Chances are good they were either falling in love or falling out of it.

Popular culture presents us very few examples of what an actual intimate relationship looks like. Most entertainment today focuses on one of two points in a relationship: the romance, or the conflict that comes after “the thrill is gone.”  There is another aspect of relationships that we seldom see, and is something we do want to...

“I think we all have empathy. We may not have enough courage to display it.”                                 

Maya Angelou

Empathy is so important and you might wonder why people don’t practice it more often especially in the light of current events. As with most human characteristics and behaviors, there is more to the story than meets the eye.

Empathy has to be developed. It is taught and practiced. We learn through words, actions and the experiences we have...

I am not a rich woman but I am a woman of privilege. I am not a socially prominent woman, but I am a woman of privilege. I am not powerful in business or politics but I am a woman of privilege. With privilege comes responsibility, and I feel it is my responsibility to add my voice to the call for justice and equality.

I live an insular life. That does not mean that I live in a white ghetto, I live in a racially integrated neighborhood that is filled with diversity. I live an insular life in that the people I live with, work with, and play with sha...

Humans need to connect with each other; it is a biological imperative.  We also need solitude. Solitude calms our nervous system, increases our creativity and heightens intimacy with our friends, family and lovers. Connection and solitude sit at two ends of a continuum.  Move beyond social connection and you find overwhelm.  Move beyond solitude and you find isolation and loneliness.

Our Personal Continuum 

Each of us has our own way of viewing this continuum, and our own opinions on what different steps of this spectrum should be called....

I am hearing a lot about boredom, restlessness and agitation these

days. The restrictions and limits we are dealing with are beginning to

lay heavy on the majority of us. Even home bodies and introverts

are finding the stay-at-home and safer-at-home orders to be a bit confining. Lethargy, loss of motivation and depression are creeping in on us.

Research tells us that we can boost our mood through activity, however that doesn’t mean occupying ourselves with any old thing. It is finding something that has meaning for each individual. If it is a meaning...

Empathy is about standing in someone else’s shoes, feeling with his or her heart, seeing with his or her eyes. Not only is empathy hard to outsource and automate, but it makes the world a better place.

Daniel H. Pink

Empathy is more than a word in a quote posted to someone’s Facebook page in an attempt to be poetic.  It’s a key ingredient in fostering loving and caring relationships. Being able to experience a situation from someone else’s point of view is a requirement for creating intimacy.

EMPATHY: A VALUABLE LIFE SKILL

Even outside a romantic co...

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