Whether it’s a friendship, a romance, a co-worker or a family member, good relationships don’t just happen. They take work, and require skills. I’ve listed six of them below that I think are crucial to maintaining good relationships in all areas of life.
1. Set Boundaries:
It is important to know where you start and end, because it is easy to lose your sense of self in a new relationship. Getting caught up in the adventure of experiencing activities and ideas from a different perspective can override paying attention to yourself. You may neglect to notice your feelings about what you are doing and the amount of time you are spending with one person. Make sure you always check in with yourself before saying yes. Ask yourself, “Is this something I truly want or need to do?”
2. Ask for what you want and need:
No one can read your mind, so it is your responsibility to verbalize your wants and needs. Listen to yourself, feel your feelings, and trust yourself.
3. Know your value and worth:
How you treat yourself teaches others how they can treat you. If you do not demonstrate to others that you respect and value yourself, they will never learn to do the same.
4. Negotiate a win-win solution:
It’s human nature to want to win an argument. However, relationships thrive when you can agree on a mutually beneficial solution. Giving is a part of that process. Stop to think about what you both need in any given situation and you will both walk away with a win.
5. Influence the people with whom you are in a relationship:
We all bring strength, talent, and the ability to think and reason into every relationship we enter. Two people working together can do more and accomplish more than one.
6. Walk away when necessary:
At times, our best efforts cannot come up with a solution that is in the best interest of all parties involved. You cannot stand strong in the face of opposition if you do not have the self-respect and strength to walk away when necessary. If you are unable to say, “no,” then it is unclear if your “yes” is true.
Learning to be in a relationship is a progress. No one can use all of these skills all of the time. We also may have more ability in one area than others. It is an awareness of our worth and what skills are needed that is the beginning point for growth. Would you like to increase your relationship skills? I can help, call me at (919)881-2001.#relationships#friendships#family